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I am so sorry for what happened to you. I've mentioned before that many years ago when I was in my 30s I went through a major medical situation (not cancer that time; my cancer has waited until I was an old lady!) and during that time I gave birth to my daughter. When I listen to you sometimes I feel like many of my experiences are just being repeated by you! I had to go into the hospital when my infant was 2 weeks old and had to stop breastfeeding for 6 weeks. I almost bled to death in the recovery room after a procedure and nobody noticed the blood leaking into the mattress. (The nurses were very busy and I seemed to be doing "so well" that they weren't checking.) I was slowly drifting off and later I realized I was going into massive shock from blood loss. Thank goodness, a doctor finally made a routine visit and saw what was happening. When I was stabilized they put me in a shared room. I do not know what was going on with the lady in the bed next to me but she yelled all the time, night and day. Constantly screaming. Like you, I was in pain and exhausted but getting no sleep whatsoever. I can laugh about it now but at the time it didn't seem very funny. I want to tell you that you are a very very brave lady. And your willingness to share your story so that the truth about what it's like to battle major illness, both the good, the bad, and the ugly, is so helpful. Even if we don't know each other, or any of the other women who are going through this and who follow you, I think we all feel that we are walking together because we connect through you. Give your dear daughter a hug from an old grandma who thanks God every day that she is still here to give her own grandchildren those hugs. As you will give them to your little grands someday.

I cried when you sent the first video. Just everything you, Gray, and baby went through. I especially remember it was so important to get the family photo session, and you soldiered through. 😮 Amazing Samantha. 🌷

That hospital stay sounds awful! Pain management isn't always easy. Morphine knocks me right out. I can't function on it. Hospitals kinda freak me out, and they aren't comfortable, you're right about that too. Being home in my own bed is sometimes the BEST feeling in the world! Your fortunate to have such a supportive family. Your mom sounds great! My mom passed away in February, and I'm still not quite myself since. She was an ICU nurse, so she was always great during these kinds of things. She woulda had that unit entirely under her authority the whole time, lol, kinda like your mom was for you. I think it's sweet. She must be terribly concerned for you, so I can't blame her for not being able to stand by watching you in that much pain! You'd do the same for your baby too! Love & hugs, Samantha! Thanks for sharing your story!

Sorry to hear about this experience. The post-op care you got sounds very similar to what I had for the same operation. A good drug combination I found is Acetominophen (Tylenol) 650mg with 1-2mg Dilaudid. Combining these two drugs gives synergistic effect, but with so many addictions, doctors (often wrongly) assume that it is gateway to abuse, even though you only need just a few pills for 3 days. Tylenol also does not prevent the fusion from forming, unlike other NSAIDs. The other thing I would recommend is a few days BEFORE the operation, apply some Kineso tape when your back is straight (or slightly arched back), so as to learn how to get out of bed, put on pants, use a cane to get out of bed etc, without breaking the tape. Because this is how you will have to do things after the surgery. The sooner you start walking after the surgery, the better, as it helps clear the inflammation. You need a lot of abdominal support to keep the back straight and stable, and learning to engage these will help. A few months after surgery back strengthening exercises (e.g. bird dogs) of the paraspinal muscles is very important, as is learning to bend with your knees and using your glutes to get up. This will protect your adjacent disks which are now taking more load when you flex. After 1-2 years of physio exercises and adaptations, I think you can feel pretty normal, again -- at least in terms of your back problems.

Poor baby just wanted her mum Very cute 😍

The screaming lady--I went through something similar. I broke my arm very badly at school in the 4th grade. I ended up the hospital in a ward type thing with an old woman screaming and yelling all night. I was pretty much out of it and throwing up all night from the anesthesia. So it was my poor mom who tried to calm the old lady, take care of me, and knock cockroaches off the wall all night. My poor mother! Thankfully the next day I was moved to a private room but I still remember the wailing all night. Now I'm recovering from breaking L1 and injuring L4/5. You've had it so much harder and you're so strong! Glad you got through all that mess!

Curcumin is a natural inflammatory..

Samantha I’m so sorry 😞 you had to go through all that nonsense at the hospital 😢. I too have been in and out of the hospital past few months. I had a similar roommate who constantly had her tv 📺 on. She didn’t yell a lot but she had to have her light on 24/7 which directly was in my right eyesight. I asked the nurse to ask her politely if she would consider the bathroom light (especially when she was sleeping), she would not budge 😠. I was in the room before she got there. Another thing the hospital allowed visitors around the clock 🙄. They tried giving me a blindfold to help sleep and earplugs. Nothing helped. I even yelled at the lady saying “You’re not the only patient healing from surgery”, you won’t even compromise! She then yelled “I’m an older lady (not much older than me) and said “I can’t sleep with the light 💡 off”. Oh my gosh when she left I was so happy. Then next lady in my room was amazing and friendly. 🙏🏼 Thank you for updating us and I hope 🤞 you continue to heal. Like the saying goes “There’s no place like home” 🦋🌹

beautiful child, I was deeply impressed by your story 😢😢😢

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Just that you have to "worry" about people roasting you is absurd. Gen X here, and I'm old enough to have experienced when there was no internet. If you had something to say, you'd have to say it in person most of the time. Just the thought of somebody visiting a ward for cancer patients, approach some random patient that you don't know and say just so you know, you should be grateful that they even take care of you!

You handled the older lady well; you have so much patience for her shenanigans when you needed your rest to help with pain. I’m so sorry you had to go through all this. You’re a trooper!!

No need to sugar code it. That was literally the worst torture! When we simply don't feel good we want peace, calm environment, not to be bothered so I can't even imagine what you went through!! ~ Take care!! You are so strong and SO unbelievable smart.❤ I wish you all the BEST!!!

Why wasn't the older lady in a specialist. Stroke ward?

Maybe hydrocodone would have worked better for you even though it's milder. Or they could have switched to dilaudid which is stronger than morphine but morphine has no maximum dose so that is helpful. There is an oral version of toradol but you're right at least the last i heard it can delay healing from surgery on bones. I wish you had had headphones or something similar to block out the lady's noise. Noise cancelling headphones could block the noise when turned on even if you don't play anything. Mine are Bose. And when the catheter balloon is deflated, it just falls out. ( Just a little wisdom from caring for some wonderful people over 30 plus years) I just thought you might need this info at some point in the future. When you know as much as possible you can advocate for yourself the best. I admire you so very much! You are my hero! If I had been your nurse, I would have been thrilled for your advice on your own care! That really helps more than you know!

That’s a trauma within a trauma. I’m so very sorry ❤

I'm sorry you're going through this. I too have MBC diagnosed @35, first was stage II@30....now on chemo, Enhertu, cuz all endocrine/hormonal tx failed me....spine, lungs and chest bones are involved...you're awesome and giving hope for so many young folks with this disease....you're amazing for sharing and inspiring more to share their journey, including my own ❤❤❤

I can't even imagine. Glad this is over behind you!

Roasted for being ungrateful? Whoever would do that is beyond evil. You have been so amazingly positive throughout this whole thing. You are the picture of grace and class ❤

Terrible staff at that hospital. That should never have happened.

I find it so strange not being able to get Toridol tablets. I understand not taking it for healing purposes. Just seems strange. You are looking better with each video. Sending prayers.

Sounds like you were in a sub-standard hospital.

❤️❤️❤️🙏🤗🤗❤️❤️❤️xx

If you have the urge to pee and you have a catheter in, it is because you the tubing is either kinked, or there could be a clot blocking off the urine from draining. You poor thing. Sounds like the hospital stay from hell! I’ve had two spinal fusions, multi level thoracic and two levels in my cervical spine, and a third to remove the metalware. I totally understand the pain! I remember waking up from my surgery in recovery and thinking oh no what have I done, the pain from multiple spinal fractures was bad enough! But man I was beside myself with pain, they got me up that next morning, made me have a shower, walk and I was almost passing out! I’ll never forget that pain it is horrible I’m so sorry x

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I’m so sorry you had to go through this experience but also so happy it is behind you! 🩷

I don't listen to music in the car or while working out to think too.

That is just ridiculous. At times especially with a horrible disease like cancer you’re going to need pain pills. And I don’t mean aspirin or Tylenol. There might be times several times when you have to take more than one. When you’re in pain you gotta do what you Gotta do. Then later, the doctor should help you wean off of it.

Fentanyl! There are band-aids prepared with Fentanyl. That you should have to be in pain, when there is help is ridiculous!

You and I went stage 4, mets in spjne and ribs at about the same time. Thank you for sharing this experience. It will be a help for me, also now I understand the weird pains I get. Fortunately my oncology team is mostly understanding and support me with therapy and pain meds, but hospitals are another trial to endure, like we don't already have enough.❤

I totally understand how frustrating it is to have a patient next to you screaming all the time and through the night ,I was in hospital for a week in February and I had a patient in the bed next to me who had very severe Alzheimer’s and she would scream and scream and yes I felt horrid for her to be so scared but when you sick it was also super frustrating too ,so I fully understand that what you went through,I’m so glad you are doing better now

Idk about babies in first class. My once in a lifetime ticket in 1st class was $12,000 . I had to ensure that I was in a quiet space and that I'd be able to sleep, otherwise I've been known to have a grand mal seisure & stop breathing. That said, anyone bringing their baby in for just the last 30 minutes of the flight is fine by me.

Samantha, everything is amplified after spinal surgery. I understand the over crowding. Here they just send people home with nurses visiting after 24 hours. The raw exterior pain and internal nerve firing is brutal. Thankful you got through it. Your story is more common than you think. Very thankful you had parents to help you with the traveling. People in first class seriously aren't always grounded in mind. Hope you are having a happy weekend ❤

Did nobody in that hospital know that sleeping helps healing!? I'm impressed at how quickly you have recovered just because from Day 1 they were setting you up for a long, painful recovery simply by not making sure you were able to get any amount of sleep. P.S. I've had multiple back surgeries, so I understand that *just* because you're able to sleep at all doesn't mean you're A-okay. It does make a small difference, though.

Nobody gets well in a hospital.

I'm the same, Samantha, I prefer silence and if I'd had to share room with someone constantly invading my space with yelling, or simply talking non-stop, playing music, it would be enough for me to scream myself. I think I'd actually scream extremely loud on purpose, just to force the staff to put me somewhere else.But that's me, I rarely win popularity contests.

Samantha, I would have felt the same way! How overwhelming & stressful 😥. I'm so sorry you are going through this, I pray for comfort & strength for you! Also, I hate the radio & prefer silence whenever I can get it.. I thought I was the only one, lol

The nurses should have called a physician to help to tranquillize the lady. The nurses should have moved you to another room or even move your bed to the hallway . The nurses direct responsibility for the comfort of the patient. I am a registered nurse.

Honey I can so relate. I'm a 70 year old wife, mother and grandmother. I had back surgery 9/1/2023 and not recovering because the surgeon fractured my L4 and will not take responsibility but that is a longer story. Because of my age they said I need to go to a Nursing home when I got there I was due for pain meds. They didn't give my my next pill for 26 hours after I call my husband to come get me. I was homme in one week.. I could go on and on. Love watching your videos. Keep them coming

No private room?

They should of never put an elderly lady in that condition in a young person's room who is in extreme pain. When my Husband had his tumor removed they put him in a private room, because I told them he was extremely scared of hospital and wanted me to stay overnight. They were very accommodating giving me pillows the lounge chair that goes all the way back, even bringing me food. I'm so sorry you went through that. Blessings and Prayers to You and Your Family ❤💙🧸🙏✨

I'm so thankful our hospitals have private rooms. I'm sorry for what you endured what you did. How did they expect you to heal being in that much pain and listening to a screaming patient.

Omg these people. I can't understand why in a hospital if you're in pain they can't prescribe anything. It's all about "you had.. 4 hours ago so you need to wait". I ended up telling my partner to go home and get my prescribed opiod tablets as the hospital made a huge fuss about giving me one. I didn't bring mine into hospital as I was told it would be given. It's dreadful. Puts me off surgeries for sure. You are incredible. An incredible mum and such a beautiful soul.

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.John 3:16-17 And the times of this ignorance God winked at; but now commandeth all men every where to repent:Acts 17:30 I tell you, Nay: but, except ye repent, ye shall all likewise perish.Luke 13:3 Jesus died for you on Calvary’s cross and rose again to offer you a pardon for all your sins. His love reaches you just as you are. If you turn to Him in faith, you will know the forgiveness of your sins and have the assurance of eternal life. Jesus said, “him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out.” John 6:37 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.John 14:6 Praying without ceasing for you and your family and friends Samantha. I'm writing what i'm writing out of all the care and love i have!🙏♥♥🙏

Babies are people too ✈️

Morphine makes me ill Fetynal i do ok with but i refuse oxy No narcotics for me. My family had addicts in it. Never struggled with substances personally but I avoid alcohol and narcotics when possible. I need to be clear headed as much as i can be

Sorry Mrs Screamerton was your roommate. There is always one and usually you can hear them all the way down the hall. Ask me how I know. Next time, demand that you be moved. The squeaky wheel gets the grease.

My heart goes out to you so very much....I wish I could help you...I put my hand on this video and prayed for you and will continue ❤

I’m dealing with Spine issues here and there to. My biggest fear is what you went through. My worry now though is the long bone in my right thigh. This is not a fun/ easy journey.

Shared wards are the worst. I’ve had my fair share of noisy patients next door, but it certainly the worst when you are in huge amounts of pain. You have been incredibly gracious understanding the trials others are going through. At the same time sleep is healing and ironically hospitals are often not restful. I’m so glad you are over those challenging days. Onwards and upwards!